3 Terrible Reasons To Leave Your Church

leaving church leave

[dropcap]I[/dropcap] have been a pastor for almost 15 years. In that time I’ve seen my share of people leave our church. Sometimes they go nicely, and for good reason. Other times they leave in a hail storm of controversy and bitterness.

Believe it or not, sometimes leaving a church is the right thing to do. Often times though, people leave for very bad reasons and when they do they cause damage to the body of believers.

Here are the 3 worst reasons you can give to leave your church body:

The Music Is Too Loud

Over the years I’ve heard this one more than a few times. If this is the only issue you have with a church it shouldn’t be enough to cause your exit. In almost every church in America (certainly every church under 300 people), the band and sound team are made up of volunteers. These well-meaning and dedicated men and women are not professional audio engineers. They are usually well-meaning folks trying to do their best on Sunday morning.

If the sound is legitimately too loud then I suggest you do a couple things:

First, volunteer to be a part of the sound team! That way, with your hand on the control knob you’ll be able to make sure the sound is just perfect for you. But be aware, you’ll likely field a number of other complaints such as, “I couldn’t hear my son’s guitar at all” or “why isn’t my daughter’s voice louder?”

Second, you could simply purchase an inexpensive pair of sound reducing ear plugs! I’m being serious. There’s no shame in doing this – especially if you love everything else about your church family.

I’m Just Not Getting Fed

Not only is this a bad reason for leaving your church, it’s not biblical. Actually, uttering the phrase “I’m not getting fed” reveals a lot about your lack of spiritual maturity. Only a spiritually immature Christian would think it’s the job of the pastors or ministry leaders to hand-feed them. As a believer, the goal is to feed yourself.

The writer of Hebrews illustrates this clearly by calling out the Jewish believers for their lack of understanding and for having the inability to feed themselves. He/she says, “For though by this time you ought to be teachers, you need someone to teach you again the basic principles of the oracles of God. You need milk, not solid food… (Heb 5:12)” We all know that babies drink milk while adults eat solid food. Infants are hand-fed, but eventually learn to eat on their own. Spiritually speaking, it’s obvious – mature Christians should be able to feed themselves. In that way, the church is less of a restaurant and more of a kitchen. The teacher makes the food (teaching) available and perhaps even combines the ingredients (draws conclusions, points out an application, etc.), but the mature believer does the work.

The church is less of a restaurant and more of a kitchen Click To Tweet

Even if you think the preaching is subpar or if you’re not 100% interested in every topic your pastor chooses, as long as the Bible is open you should be able to get something out of it. You might just have to do some of the chewing.

The Church Is Full Of Hypocrites

Well, that’s just stupid. Yes, the church is full of hypocrites. It’s full of liars, drunks, and cheaters too. Complaining about a church being full of sinners is like complaining about too many sick people being in a hospital. Sick people belong in a hospital and sinners belong in a church!

Complaining about a church being full of sinners is like complaining about too many sick people being in a hospital. Click To Tweet

If you leave your church hoping to avoid hypocrites then you’ll never find a church home. Every church is full of men and women who are recovering from the effect of sin in their lives. When Paul wrote to the church in Ephesus he said, “put off your old self, which belongs to your former manner of life and is corrupt through deceitful desires, and to be renewed in the spirit of your minds, and to put on the new self, created after the likeness of God in true righteousness and holiness. (Eph 4:22-24)” Obviously, Paul has to say this because it’s not exactly happening–the people need a reminder. And guess where they are? In the church!

If you feel the need to leave a church because it’s full of hypocrites then the best thing to do is take a good look in the mirror. There’s a good chance you have a plank in your eye! (Matt 7:5)

So, are there reasons to leave a church? Of course! There are several good reasons to leave but they are all Biblical reasons. Stay tuned, I will write an article called, “3 Biblical Reasons To Leave Your Church” next week.

8 thoughts on “3 Terrible Reasons To Leave Your Church”

  1. I am almost 70…yikes!…and I love the music at Life Point and I don’t wear earplugs!
    I grew up in the 50’s and 60’s, and so did my taste in music, for which I am thankful! We sang the choruses of my generation, and grew into the more contemporary music!
    We must reach each new generation as they come, often seeking a real faith. Our music today addresses that in the right way! Don’t change a thing!

    1. Lynn,
      Thank you for your comment! I love your input here because it shows that you’re interested in the needs of others and not just yourself. That is awesome. Thanks for reading and being part of the conversation.
      God bless,

  2. Funny how all of these reasons come down to a single deriving factor: “me” mentality. When we make church all about “me” and what I get out of it, it’s just going to be the beginning of a slippery slope. Sometimes you do need to guard your heart and your well being in such a way, but as a general rule I think it’s important to figure out for yourself – are you attending church for you, or for what you can do for Hof and others?

    1. God, not the Hoff. Darn autocorrect. Though I’m sure the Hoff should be discussed at some point.

    2. Laura,
      Thanks for your comment! You’ve nailed it. I’ve fallen into that “me” trap over the years several times, thinking that everything should be exactly what I want instead of thinking of others. Thanks for reading and commenting. 🙂 By the way, I think the HOF agrees.

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  4. As someone else said, the problem seems to be emphasis on “me” or “what do i get out of it?:”
    at the same time though, if the preaching is sub=par and you just dont relate to the music or the people.. that could be a legitimate reason.
    Our music minister went to another town to start a church. I loved his music so much I went to visit and thought about changing, but ended up not changing.
    I guess there is a balance there somewhere

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